Every three months I have a moment of truth. The real deal, a check up to see where I am at and where I am going; Fine-tuning a compass to make sure it is actually pointed in the right direction. It is important to know which way you are going, in order to get there.
The floors were very shiny, much that of a bowling ball with polish reflecting the overhead brightly radiant lights. I was amongst my people! Cyborgs! Everyone seems to have some kind of mechanical aid, either built in, or an extension of them. Welcome to space, the 2nd floor, the department of Surgery and Orthopaedics. I get a happier feeling each time I come, a great sign of healing and morale boosting.
I zoned out a while in the sitting room, and the Dr, my new friend from the injury came to greet me at his door. I step into the doctor’s office. ” We don’t have to scan your back, it’ll make no difference. ” I replied with my umm face, “Just don’t let anything hit me in the back right?” “Yes.” He replied.
We were standing with the pity patter catching up over the last few months.
As I reached for the chair, the Doctor darted, “Nope, not yet.” He lifts my shirt to check my back. “ The two halves are not equal yet, there is still an imbalance.” The right and left sides are disproportional. Continuing, he taps my back to feel the difference, a test for pain and for imbalances in the muscles. “Ouch!” my shirt comes back down. My back tenderized. I have earned the right to sit down.
If we have to do anything, we should do a nerve conductance test to check progress and nerve function. This is a dread of mine. Needles inserted into my body, with electrical currents shooting through me, then being told to relax as I am tasered! It is a total oxymoron. Just try putting a finger in the socket while getting electrocuted and relax at the same time. It just does not happen, unless that is a fake detachable rubber finger.
Rounding up we took a picture and arranged for the next meetings. Getting up from the chair, the doctor patted me on the back and said, “See you next time! Oops!” With a half frown smile back at him, “ See you in three months, “ I limped out of his office. “Ugh!” He patted my back again!
We parted with his famous words, “ You don’t know, if you don’t try.” I grinned back. Something I’ve heard since the beginning of my injury. There is some truth in his words. If you are ready, there is no reason to stand ideal, start moving, and do it. Do not procrastinate. If you cannot do it yet, get yourself to the point where you can and follow through.
How do you know, if you don’t try?