The other day I was carrying a bag with bops and bits plus my laptop. This is probably an unwise thing for me to do right now. I normally bring it out with me for a change of environment; to get a peace of mind and inspiration. However, recently on one of these excursions, I had an attacked of a sudden nerve pain that rendered me completely useless for a while.
The backpack was indeed too heavy for me this time, and the bouncing had taken its toll on my back as I walked. That intense nerve pain crippled me for a moment, barely allowing me to move. There was an automatic flow of tears down my face partially from the pain, and also because of the helplessness that I was facing. I had to head for home.
I was sitting and shaking, bracing on the painful ride home. Upon reaching home, I struggled to lay down flat on the much needed hard ground. The tears continued with the needle poking pain as I remained in that posture for a long while, until I was able to slowly move again. While my painful back was on the floor, I spend the whole time running through what I was planning to do once I passed this period, and what I was going to do to prevent this from occurring again.
Such moments like this are crossroads where I wondered if I should give up, because it hurts too much. I envision my life continuing in this state if I did not do anything more. What would it be like if I just gave up? I refused to think more. I wiped the tears and decided to change my thoughts. No, I will not and must not let this consume me. I will train even harder and become better because I must improve to be totally well. I have to do it for a better life. This painful experience will propel me to do the best that I can for myself.
On the next day, I made my way to the pool. I felt like taking a break. Every ounce in me wanted to have that rest because I felt a little sick, tired and tender. My body just felt lazy, and all excuses are definitely a good enough excuse to take a big rest from the daily grind.
Once I got started on the swim, the first 10, 20, 30 laps were the easy part and then it was all a mind game. Now, I get to find out what I am really made out of. I went through the motions one stroke at a time. As I pulled through the water inching forward on every stroke, I was also thinking to myself if I could really complete this session.
I guess as long as I gave all that I had, it would be enough. I went through the motions. Then, a cramp started up in the foot of my right leg. I hesitated for a second while swimming… the cramp spread, but I decided to push on. The leg now had a sympathetic companion as I started to have a cramp in my other leg! Most people would think this is dangerous and I would too if I had been using my whole body to swim, but since I have been training with only my upper body, it did not affect me that much. I just kept swimming, concentrating on each lap. Voila! By the end of my swim the cramps sorted itself out. It subsided. The good upside to training with only my upper body is that cramps in the lower extremities do not affect my ability to perform.
Though my body wanted an excuse to rest or to give up, my brain just refused to give in. No matter how I feel, I must move forward to always do the best that my body allows, or to face the consequences of my behaviour. This way I had no other choice, but out of necessity to keep progressing and be proactive.
So, I will continue rehabilitation everyday. If I had not worked on my health every single day since my injury, I would not have recovered to be where I am today.
It is easy to take a break with an excuse and to quit just for today, but that would open a gate to a disaster of procrastination. If I quit today, it becomes easier to quit tomorrow, and if I quit tomorrow, it because even easier to quit the next day. Excuse after excuse, long and behold, before I know it I would not be improving any more, and this is not what I want. Therefore, if I want something, I got to make it happen. I need to help myself by being consistent with my plan. I need to work diligently on my plan, time and time again; until it becomes a habit and that habit becomes an automatic part of me. I will become what I want to become, as planned.
I have come a long way with recuperation, and I still have a long way to go. My persistence and consistency of an exercise plan initially started with tremendous, tear dropping pain, snail slow movements and great endurance. However, I can gently pat myself on my back now to reinforce all the hard work and dedication on myself, but I rather just smile. Doing everything I could in my power enabling myself to be what I am today physically and mentally is a reward in itself.
We have to stay on our daily grind and do everything in our power to get what we want for our own benefit. It is a long way to get there but if we take it a step at a time, we will be there in no time.
What practices are you doing in your daily grind to encourage success?